top ten lists

Things To Think About Our Government:

1. 29 Members of Congress have been accused of spousal abuse.
   
   
2. 7 Have been arrested for fraud.
   
   
3. 19 Have been accused of writing bad checks.
   
   
4. 117 Have bankrupted at least two businesses.
   
   
5. 3 Have been arrested for assault.
   
   
6. 71 Have credit reports so bad they can't qualify for a credit card.
   
   
7. 14 Have been arrested on drug related charges.
   
   
8. 8 Have been arrested for shoplifting,
   
   
9. 21 Are current defendants in lawsuits.
   
   
10. 84 Were stopped for drunk driving in 1998 alone, but released after they claimed Congressional immunity.
    
    

Gas Prices vs ?

People have been complaining about the rising price of gasoline recently, but I have always thought that gas was a good value (especially if you were to take the $0.30, $0.40 per gallon tax off at the pump)! Obviously others need a little convincing. So the article in this week's "Autoweek" magazine brought it all to light. What if you were to buy a gallon of . . .

1. - Diet Snapple 16 oz for $1.29 = $10.32 per gallon
   
   
2. - Lipton Ice Tea 16 oz for $1.19 = $9.52 per gallon
   
   
3. - Gatorade 20 oz for $1.59 = $10.17 per gallon
   
   
4. - Ocean Spray 16 oz for $1.25 = $10.00 per gallon
   
   
5. - Quart of Milk 16 oz for $1.59 = $6.32 per gallon
   
   
6. - Evian (water) 9 oz for $1.49 = $21.19 per gallon
   
   
7. - STP Brake Fluid 12 oz for $3.15 = $33.60 per gallon
   
   
8. - Vicks Nyquil 6 oz for $8.35 = $178.13 per gallon
   
   
9. - Pepto Bismol 4 oz for $3.85 = $123.20 per gallon
   
   
10. - Whiteout 7 oz for $1.39 = $254.17 per gallon
    
    
11. - Scope 1.5 oz for $0.99 = $84.84 per gallon
    
    

So next time you're at the pump, be glad your car doesn't run on Nyquil or Scope or Whiteout!

Useless Inventions

1. Non stick Cellotape
   
   
2. Solar Powered Flash Light
   
   
3. A black highlighter pen
   
   
4. Glow in the dark sunglasses
   
   
5. Inflatable Anchor
   
   
6. Smooth Sandpaper
   
   
7. Waterproof sponge
   
   
8. Waterproof Teabags
   
   
9. AC adapter for Solar powered calculators
   
   
10. Fireproof Matches
    
    
11. Fireproof Cigarettes
    
    
12. Battery powered Battery Charger
    
    
13. Seatbelts for Motorbikes
    
    
14. Hand powered Chainsaw
    
    
15. Inflatable Dartboard
    
    
16. Silent Alarm Clock
    
    
17. A Pedal powered wheelchair
    
    
18. Braille Drivers Manual
    
    
19. Double sided playing cards
    
    
20. Ejector seats for Helicopters
    
    

Signs You're Really Broke

1. American Express calls and says: "Leave home without it!"
   
   
2. Your idea of a 7-course meal is taking a deep breath outside a fine restaurant.
   
   
3. You're formulating a plan to rob the food bank.
   
   
4. You've rolled so many pennies, you've formed a psychic bond with Abe.
   
   
5. Long distance companies no longer call you to switch.
   
   
6. Your credit card companies raised the rates from 6.9% to 24.9%.
   
   
7. You see your roommate as a large fried chicken in tennis shoes.
   
   
8. You receive care packages from Europe.
   
   
9. Your bologna has no first name.
   
   
10. You rob Peter...and then rob Paul.
    
    
11. You finally clean your house, hoping to find change.
    
    
12. You think of a lottery ticket as an investment.
    
    
13. You give blood everyday - for the orange juice.
    
    
14. McDonalds supplies you with all your kitchen condiments.
    
    
15. Consumer Credit Counseling services said "No."
    
    
16. The neighborhood dog stopped sniffing at your pockets.