Sports

Q) What did the hockey goalie say to his teammate?

A) Let's get the "puck" out of here!

Yo' mama so stupid, she went to a Clippers game to get a haircut!

Two men have been sitting out on a lake all day long, ice fishing. One has been having no luck at all and the other has been pulling fish after fish out of his hole in the ice. The man having no luck finally leans over and asks the other what his secrect is.
"mmmmm mmm mm mmm mmmm mmm mmm."
"I'm sorry, what did you say?"
"mmmmm mmm mm mmm mmmm mmm mmm."
"I'm sorry, I still didn't understand you." The successful man spits something into his hand.
"You've got to keep your worms warm."

What do you get when you cross a football player with a hooker?

An illegal procedure.