silly collection 05
I'd tell you another joke about a pencil.
But it doesn't have any point!
Why do idiots eat biscuits?
Because they're crackers!
What was the gangsters last words?
Who put that violin in my violin case!
Did you hear about the little boy that they named after his father?
They called him dad!
What has forty feet and sings?
The school choir!
Did you hear about the stupid Kamikaze pilot?
He flew 57 missions!
Why does a flamingo lift up one leg?
Because if he lifted up both legs it would fall over!
But it doesn't have any point!
Why do idiots eat biscuits?
Because they're crackers!
What was the gangsters last words?
Who put that violin in my violin case!
Did you hear about the little boy that they named after his father?
They called him dad!
What has forty feet and sings?
The school choir!
Did you hear about the stupid Kamikaze pilot?
He flew 57 missions!
Why does a flamingo lift up one leg?
Because if he lifted up both legs it would fall over!
silly collection 06
What is Cheddar Gorge?
A large cheese sandwich!
What happens when you throw a green stone in the red sea?
It gets wet!
Why did the woman take a loaf of bread to bed with her?
To feed her nightmare!
What city cheats at exams?
Peking!
What makes the leaning Tower of Pisa lean?
It doesn't eat much!
Why is Alabama the smartest state in the USA?
Because it has 4 A's and one B!
Who invented fire?
Some bright spark!
A large cheese sandwich!
What happens when you throw a green stone in the red sea?
It gets wet!
Why did the woman take a loaf of bread to bed with her?
To feed her nightmare!
What city cheats at exams?
Peking!
What makes the leaning Tower of Pisa lean?
It doesn't eat much!
Why is Alabama the smartest state in the USA?
Because it has 4 A's and one B!
Who invented fire?
Some bright spark!
silly collection 07
Why do birds fly south in the winter?
Because it's too far to walk!
What is "out of bounds"?
An exhausted kangaroo!
Have you ever seen a duchess?
Yes - it's the same as an English "s"!
What followed the dinosaur?
It's tail!
Did you hear about the mad scientist who put dynamite in his fridge?
They say it blew his cool!
Would you like a duck egg for tea?
Only if you quack it for me!
I've got a wonder watch. It only cost fifty cents.
Why is it a wonder watch?
Because every time I look at it I wonder if it is still working!
Because it's too far to walk!
What is "out of bounds"?
An exhausted kangaroo!
Have you ever seen a duchess?
Yes - it's the same as an English "s"!
What followed the dinosaur?
It's tail!
Did you hear about the mad scientist who put dynamite in his fridge?
They say it blew his cool!
Would you like a duck egg for tea?
Only if you quack it for me!
I've got a wonder watch. It only cost fifty cents.
Why is it a wonder watch?
Because every time I look at it I wonder if it is still working!
silly collection 08
How did the telephones get married?
In a double ring ceremony!
What is a polygon?
A dead parrot!
Dad, there is a man at the door collecting for the new swimming pool.
Give him a glass of water!
Eat up your spinach, it'll put color in your cheeks.
But I don't want green cheeks!
"Quick, take the wheel", said the nervous driver.
"Why?"
"Because there is a tree coming straight for us!"
Where does success come before work?
In the dictionary!
Did you hear about the fool you keeps going around saying "no"?
No. Oh, so it's you!
In a double ring ceremony!
What is a polygon?
A dead parrot!
Dad, there is a man at the door collecting for the new swimming pool.
Give him a glass of water!
Eat up your spinach, it'll put color in your cheeks.
But I don't want green cheeks!
"Quick, take the wheel", said the nervous driver.
"Why?"
"Because there is a tree coming straight for us!"
Where does success come before work?
In the dictionary!
Did you hear about the fool you keeps going around saying "no"?
No. Oh, so it's you!
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