sick jokes jokes

Mommy, Mommy! What's a werewolf?

Shut up and comb your face!

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Mommy, Mommy! Billy won't let go of my ear.

Billy, let go of Susie's ear.

Billy! Let go of her ear!

All right Billy, give me the ear.

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Mommy, Mommy! I hate daddy's guts.

Well, just leave them on the side of the plate.

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Mommy, Mommy! Why is daddy so pale?

Shut up and keep digging.

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Mommy, Mommy! I don't like grandpa.

Well, just push him aside and eat your beans.

Mommy, Mommy! My teacher says my head is too big.

Shut up and get your hat from the garage, so your father can bring the car in!

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Mommy, Mommy! Can I play in the sandbox?

Not until I find a better place to bury Daddy.

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Mommy, Mommy! Why can't we give Dad a decent burial?

Shut up and keep flushing.

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Mommy, Mommy! Daddy's on fire!

Shut up and get the marshmallows!

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Mommy, Mommy! Daddy fell in the campfire!

Shut up and get the barbecue sauce!

Mommy, Mommy! What happened to all that dog food Fido wouldn't eat?

Shut up and eat your meat loaf.

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Mommy, Mommy! When are we going to have Aunt Edna for dinner?

Shut up, we haven't even finished your Grandmother yet.

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Mommy, Mommy! I hate my sister's guts.

Shut up and eat what's put in front of you.

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Mommy, Mommy! What is a deliquent child?

Shut up, light your cigarette, drink your whisky and deal those cards.

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Mommy, Mommy! What is a deliquent child?

Shut up and pass me the crowbar.

Mommy, Mommy! There's something in daddy's eye!

Shut up and eat around it.

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Mommy, Mommy! Why can't we get a garbage compactor?

Shut up and chew!

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Mommy, Mommy! Daddy's too tough!

Shut up and keep chewing!

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Mommy, Mommy! Why can't I play with the other kids?

Shut up and deal.

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Mommy, Mommy! My head hurts!

Shut up and get away from the dart board!