school jokes for kids

Why did the pioneers cross the country in covered wagons?
Because they didn't want to wait 40 years for a train!

Why did the teacher wear sunglasses?
Because his class was so bright!

1st Roman Soldier: What is the time?
2nd Roman Soldier: XX past VII!

Did you hear about the cross eyed teacher?
He couldn't control his pupils!

Teacher: What family does the octopus belong to?
Pupil: Nobody I know!

Why did the Romans build straight roads?
So their soldiers didn't go around the bend!

When a knight in armour was killed in battle, what sign did they put on his grave?
Rust in peace!

What famous chiropodist ruled England?
William the Corn-cutter!

What English King invented the fireplace?
Alfred the grate!

What's yellow, has wheels and lies on its back?
A dead school bus!

When were King Arthur's army too tired to fight?
When they had lots of sleepless knights!

How do bees get to school?
By school buzz!

How did you do in your tests?
I did what George Washington did!

Teacher: I hope I didn't see you looking at Fred's test paper.
Pupil: I hope you didn't see me either!

Teacher: You copies from Fred's exam paper didn't you?
Pupil: How did you know?
Teacher: Fred's paper says "I don't know" and you have put "Me, neither"!

What was Camelot famous for?
It's knight life!

What was that?
Went down in history!

Do you know the 20th President of the United States?
No, we were never introduced!

A math joke
Teacher, I can't solve this problem.
Any five year old should be able to solve this one.
No wonder I can't do it then, I'm nearly ten!

Teacher: Why can't you ever answer any of my questions?
Pupil: Well if I could there wouldn't be much point in me being here!

What did the computer do at lunchtime?
Had a byte!