a redneck taped paper to his television...
A redneck taped toilet paper to his television.
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He said, "Hey, lookie here, now we have free paper view!"
you might be a redneck if you can french-kiss...
You might be a redneck if you can french kiss with a toothpick in your mouth.
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stayin' alive
A cowboy told his grandson the secret to a long life.
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He said, "You gotta sprinkle a little gunpowder on your oatmeal, see. If you do, you'll live to a nice ripe old age."
So the cowboy did this religiously every day, and sure enough, lived to the nice ripe old age of 96.
When he died he left behind 4 children, 8 grandchildren, 15 great-grandchildren
...and a 16 foot hole in the wall of the crematorium.
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