old age jokes

OLD POSTAL CARRIERS never die, they just lose their zip

OLD PRINTERS never die, they're just not the type

OLD PROGRAMMERS never die, they just byte it

OLD PROGRAMMERS never die, they just decompile

OLD PROGRAMMERS never die, they just get bugged with life

OLD PROGRAMMERS never die, they just go to bits

OLD PROGRAMMERS never die, they just lose their memory

OLD PROGRAMMERS never die, they just move to new addresses

OLD PROGRAMMING WIZARDS never die, they just recurse

OLD PROPANE TANKS never die, they just run out of gas

OLD PROSITUTES never die, they just fake away...

OLD PUNTERS never die, they just go horse

OLD QUARTERBACKS never die, they just fade back and pass away

OLD QUILTERS never die, they just go to pieces

OLD QUILTERS never die, they just go under cover

OLD RADIOS never die, they just stop receiving

OLD RAILROADERS never die, they just derail

OLD RAIN PUDDLES never die, they just dry up

OLD SAILORS never die, they just get a little "DINGHY"

OLD SAILORS never die, they just lose their porpoise

OLD SALESMEN never die, they just go out of commission

OLD SCHOOLS never die, they just lose their principals

OLD SCOTS never die, but they can be kilt

OLD SCULPTORS never die, they just lose their marbles

OLD SEAMSTRESSES never die, they just come to the point

OLD SEERS never die, they just lose their vision

OLD SEWAGE WORKERS never die, they just waste away

OLD SHEETROCKERS (dry wallers) never die, they just hang around

OLD SHOES MAKERS never die, they just lose their sole

OLD SKIERS never die, but they go downhill fast

OLD SOCCER PLAYERS never die, they just achieve their final goal

OLD SOCCER PLAYERS never die, they just lose their kick

OLD SOLDIERS never die, they just fade away

OLD SOLDIERS never die, they just smell that way

OLD SOLDIERS never die, young ones do

OLD SOURDOUGHS never die, they just ferment away

OLD SPELUNKERS never die, they just cave in

OLD STEELMAKERS never die, they just lose their temper

OLD STUDENTS never die, they just get degraded

OLD SWIMMERS never die, they just fall off their blocks

OLD SWIMMERS never die, they just have a stroke

OLD SWIMMERS never die, they just kick-off

OLD SYSTEM USERS never die, they just chdir to NULL

OLD TANNERS never die, they just go into hiding

OLD TAPE DISPENSERS never die, they just get used up

OLD TEACHERS never die, they just lose their class

OLD TELEPHONES never die, they just stop ringing

OLD THERMODYNAMICISTS never die, they just achieve their state -- of maximum entropy

OLD TIRE TUBES never die, they just get punctured

OLD TRASH never dies, they just bury it

OLD TRIGONOMETRY TEACHERS never die, they just lose their identities

OLD TROMBONISTS never die - they just slide away...

OLD TRUCK DRIVERS never die; they just get a new Peterbilt

OLD TV SHOWS never die, they just get rerun on Nickelodeon

OLD TV SOAP STARS never die, they become pathetic

OLD GOAL UMPIRES never die, they just get flagged down -- umpires as in Australian Rules Football

OLD USENETTERS never die, they just become unresponsive

OLD VACATIONERS never die, they just don't come back

OLD VIOLINISTS never die - they just become unstrung.

OLD VOICEMAIL SYSTEMS never die, they just stop answering