Men And Women jokes

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Men And Women


viva las vegas
 
 
A man comes home to find his wife packing her bags and he asks, "Where are you going?" he asked.

"To Las Vegas! I found out that there are men who will pay me $400 to do what I do for you for free!"

The man pondered that thought for a moment, and then began packing HIS bags. "What do you think you are doing?" she screamed.

"Going to Las Vegas with you... I want to see how you'll live on $800 a year!"

red ball express
 
 
All drivers for Red Ball Express had orders to never ever pick up hitchhikers. Ol' Freddy was high-ballin' down the highway and saw an unbelievably stunning blonde hitch-hiking. Thinking with the wrong head, he pulled over and picked her up. Travelling down the highway, she leaned forward and looked in the rearview mirror.

"You have a flat back there on the trailer," she said. Freddy pulled over, went back to have a look. While he was back there, the blonde slid over and drove off. Freddy was now pissed off. Soon, a motorcycle gang pulled up, beat the crap out of him and left Freddy naked and broke. Another Red Ball Express driver saw Fred and recognized him.

"Fred, you okay?" he asked. Fred told him the entire story.

"Oh, Fred," said the driver, unzipping his pants. "This just isn't your day."

what's your poison?
 
 
Once there lived a mother who had two sons who were very young. The mother only gave milk to one son and neglected the other son.

The milkless son decided to apply poison on his mother's breast so that the other son would get killed.

When he woke up the next morning he found that his father had died.

black sheep
 
 
A tribal leader finds that his wife has had a white baby. Enraged, he brings the baby to the missionary at the tribe and says, "You are the only white man to inhabit our land. Explain to me how my baby is white." Terrified, missionary responds, "Now, now..please do not make any hasty assumptions. Look at those white sheep over there? Among them there is one black one. There is no explanation as to how it got that color and is just a miracle of nature." The tribe leader pauses for a second, then says, "I apologize, sir. I understand you well and clear. I'll keep quiet about the baby if you keep quiet about the sheep."

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