GIRLFRIEND 1.0 -> WIFE 1.0

Jokes » men and women » girlfriend 1 0 > wife 1 0

GIRLFRIEND 1.0 -> WIFE 1.0
MEMORANDUM  RE:  Computer Software Warning   
Last year a friend of mine upgraded GirlFriend 1.0 to Wife 1.0 and found that it's a memory hog  leaving very little system resources for other  applications. He is only now noticing that Wife  1.0 also is spawning Child-Processes which are  further consuming valuable resources. No mention  of this particular phenomena was included in the  productbrochure or the documentation, though other  users have informed him that this is to be  expected due to the nature of the application. Not  only that, Wife 1.0 installs itself such that it  is always launched at system initialization where  it can monitor all other system activity. He's  finding that some applications such as  PokerNight 8.3, BeerBash 2.5, and PubNight 7.0 are  no longer able to run in the system at all,  crashing the system when selected (even though  they always worked fine before).    At installation, Wife 1.0 provides no option as  to the installation of undesired Plug-Ins such as  MotherInLaw 55.8 and BrotherInLaw Beta release.  Also, system performance seems to diminish with  each passing day.     
Some features he'd like to see in the upcoming  Wife 2.0.  -  A 'Don't remind me again' button  -  Minimize button  -  An install shield feature that allows Wife  2.0 to be installed with the option to uninstall  at anytime without the loss of cache and other  system resources.  -  An option to run the network driver in  promiscuous mode which would allow the systems  hardware probe feature to be much more useful.   
I myself decided to avoid all of the headaches  associated with Wife 1.0 by sticking with  GirlFriend 2.0. Even here, however, I found many  problems. Apparently you cannot install GirlFriend  2.0 on top of GirlFriend 1.0. You must uninstall  GirlFriend 1.0 first. Other users say this is a  long standing bug which I should have been aware  of.    Apparently the versions of GirlFriend have  conflicts over shared use of the  I/O port. You  think they would have fixed such a stupid bug by  now.    To make matters worse, The uninstall program for  GirlFriend 1.0 doesn't work very well leaving  undesirable traces of the application in the  system.    Another thing that sucks - all versions of  GirlFriend continually pop up little annoying  messages about the advantages of upgrading to Wife  1.0     
*****  BUG WARNING  ********  Wife 1.0 has an undocumented bug. If you try to  install Mistress 1.1 before uninstalling Wife 1.0,  Wife 1.0 will delete MSMoney files before doing  the uninstall itself. Then Mistress 1.1 will  refuse to install, claiming insufficient  resources.     
*** BUG WORK-AROUNDS ***************  To avoid the above bug, try installing Mistress  1.1 on a different system and never run any file  transfer applications such as LapLink 6.0. Also,  beware of similar shareware applications that have  beenknown to carry viruses that may affect Wife  1.0.    Another solution would be to run Mistress 1.0  via a UseNet provider under an anonymous name.  Here again, beware of the viruses which can  accidentally be downloaded from the UseNet.