Gross

What is the square root of 69?

Ate something.

I heard my tire thumping, I thought it was flat. When I looked at my tire I discovered your cat. Sorry...

A football player walked into a motel on a rainy night. He asked the manager for a room for one night. The manager said, "I only have one room left and I don't think you want it." The football player asked, "why not." "It's haunted," the manager said. The football player said, "Well, I'll kill the ghost or whatever is in it." The manager said "OK!"

That night when the football player was just getting settled, he heard a voice. He listened and heard it again and it said, 'If the log rolls over we all will drown.'

With that he ran out of the room screaming.
The next night a woman came in and wanted a room. The manager did not argue with this because there were still no rooms left except for that one. So she got the key and went to her room. As she got settled in she heard, 'If the log rolls over we all will drown.' She walked around and realized it was coming fron the bathroom. She looked in the toilet and saw three ants singing on a turd, 'If the log rolls over we all will drown.'

A man was visiting Spain and passed by a restaurant in Madrid after a bullfight. They were advertising that they served the balls of the bull who lost the bullfight. Intrigued, the man went inside, only to find that where was a six-week waiting list to get to eat the loser's balls. So he signed up and came back six weeks later. When he got his meal, there were two teeny, teeny balls on his plate. He called the waiter over to complain.

"I've waited six weeks for bull balls. What are these?"

"Sir," the waiter said, "the bull doesn't always lose."