west virginia custody battle
The scene was a tiny mountain village in a remote section of West Virginia. An old mountaineer and his young wife were getting a divorce in the local court, but custody of the children was a problem.
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The mother jumped to her feet and protested to the judge that since she had brought the children into this world, she should retain custody of them.
The old mountaineer also wanted custody of the children.
The judge asked for his side of the story and, after a long moment of silence, the mountaineer slowly rose from his chair and said, "Judge, when I put a quarter in a candy machine and a candy bar comes out, does it belong to me or the machine?"
say cheese
What's the longest word in the dictionary?
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Smiles.
Why?
Because there's a mile between the first and last letters.
toy cars and breastices
What do women's breasts and toy cars have in common?
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They're meant for kids but dads end up playing with both!
dolly parton's kids
Q: How can you find Dolly Parton's kids in a crowd?
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A: They're the ones with the stretchmarks on their lips.
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