Children

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Children


everyone's doing it
Q: What's bright eyed and bushy tailed?

A: A squirrel on crack.

fast food
Yo mama is so stupid, she smashed open her TV hoping to find a TV dinner.
father's day product placement
On Father's Day, a little boy decides to make his dad breakfast in bed. He makes scrambled eggs, toast and coffee. He brings it into his dad, hands him the cup of coffee and says,'Try it dad.'

The dad takes a sip and nearly passes out because it is so strong. The little boy asks,'How do you like it Dad?'

The dad doesn't want to hurt the little boy's feelings so he says, 'This is....something else, I've never tasted coffee quite like this before, Son.'

The little boy smiles from ear to ear. And says, 'Drink some more Pops.'

As the dad is drinking, he notices two army men in the bottom of the cup, and says,'Hey! Why did you put army men in here?'

The little boy again smiles and sings,'The Best Part Of Waking Up, Is SOLDIERS In Your Cup.'

feet first
One day little Danny was in Sunday School, and the preacher asked what part of the body went to heaven first.

Susie said your heart, 'cause you need it to love.

Richie said your head, 'cause you need it to think.

Little Danny raised his hand and the pastor called on him reluctantly. Danny said, "Your feet."

Confused, the pastor asked why.

Danny replied, "I was walking past my mom's room last night and she had her feet in the air and then she screamed, "Oh God, I'm coming!"


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