Children

Q: What did the DNA say to the other DNA?

A: Do these genes make my butt look fat.

A lady and her baby get on a bus. The bus driver looks at the lady, and then her baby, and then screams, "AHHHH! That's the ugliest child I've ever seen in my life!"

The lady then, totally disgusted, marches up to the back of the bus to sit down.

As she was sitting there absolutely furious, a man asks, "Are you ok, dear?"

The lady replies, "I'm so angry, that bus driver just insulted me."

The man says, "You go back up there and give that bus driver a piece of your mind, and I'll watch your monkey."

A little boy gets on a bus and sits behind the busdriver. As they're driving along, he sings, "If my daddy was a bull and my mommy was a cow, then I'd be a little bull." Annoyed, the busdriver tells the little boy to sit down, but the little boy continues, "If my daddy was a stag and my mommy was a deer, I'd be a little stag." The busdriver, tells the boy to shut up, but the little boy keeps singing, "If my daddy..." The busdriver suddently turns around and asks, "What if your daddy was gay and your mommy was a hooker?" The little boy then begins singing, "If my daddy was gay and my mommy was a hooker, then I'd be a busdriver."

One day, a little boy wrote to Santa Clause, "Please send me a sister."
Santa Clause wrote him back, "Ok, send me your mother."