Bush

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Bush


bush's joint chiefs of staff
George Bush is so dumb he thinks the Joint Chiefs of Staff are a bunch of indians who roll extra fat doobies.
bush's tragedy
One day, President Bush visited an elementary school. All the kids were so excited to get to meet the President. He began to talk to them and asked them to define the word 'tragedy.'

"Well," one girl replied, "If my mommy ran over my dog, Rover, that would be a tragedy!"

The President smiled at the little girl and said, "No, sweetie. That would be an accident! Can anyone give it a try?"

A little boy sitting across the room raised his hand and said, "I know! I know! If our bus driver ran off of a cliff and killed everyone!"

The President shook his head and said, "No son. That would be a great loss! Doesn't anyone know of a good example of a tragedy?"

A small girl raised her hand and said, "Well, Mr. President, if you and Laura were in Air Force One and it was hit by a missile and blown to smithereens, most people would think that that was a tragedy!"

"Very good," he said. "And what was your reason for that answer?"

"Well," she said, "It would not be an accident and it sure would not be a great loss!"

bush's winning campaign slogans
1. I'll turn capital punishment into a new game show!

2. I promise to get cocaine off our streets: 1 kilo at a time.

3. I'll finish what Bill started -- the interns.

4. Like father, like son. You liked my dad, right?

5. Vote for the GOP, Not OPP.

6. I promise no sex scandal -- just look at me!

7. New penal plan: I won't use mine!

8. Read my lips: Al Gore Sucks.

9. George W. Bush: No hang-ups. Just hangovers.

10. Vote for Bush and against Common Sense.

bush, einstein and picasso
When Einstein died and arrived at the gates of heaven, St. Peter wouldn't let him in until he proved his identity.

Einstein scribbled out a couple of his equations, and was admitted into paradise.

And when Picasso died, St. Peter asked, "How do I know you're Picasso?"

Picasso sketched out a couple of his masterpieces. St. Peter was convinced and let him in.

When George W. Bush died, he went to heaven and met the man at the gates. "How can you prove to me you're George W. Bush?" Saint Peter said.

Bush replied, "Well heck, I dont know."

St. Peter says, "Well, Albert Einstein showed me his equations and Picasso drew his famous pictures. What can you do to prove you're George W. Bush?"

Bush replies, "Who are Albert Einstein and Picasso?"

St. Peter says, "It must be you, George, c'mon on in."


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