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Blonde


name those tracks
 
 
Two gorgeous blonde biologists were in the field one fine summer day. While following a game trail, they came across a pair of tracks. "Look! a pair of tracks" The first blonde said while pointing to the ground.

"Those are deer tracks," the other blonde replied.

"Oh no,"she said to the first, "Those are definitely moose tracks."
With this, they began to argue. In fact, they were still arguing when the train hit them.

easter blondies
 
 
Three blondes died and found themselves standing before St. Peter. He told them before they could enter Heaven, they had to tell him what Easter was.

The first blonde said, "Easter is a holiday where they have a big feast and we give thanks and eat turkey."

St. Peter said, "Noooooo," and he banished her to hell.

The second blonde said, "Easter is when we celebrate Jesus' birth and exchange gifts."

St. Peter said, "Noooooo," and he banished her to hell.

The third blonde said, she knew what Easter is, and St. Peter said,"So, tell me."

She said, "Easter is a Christian holiday that coincides with the Jewish festival of Passover. Jesus was having Passover feast with His disciples when he was betrayed by Judas, and the Romans arrested him. The Romans hung Him on the cross and eventually He died. Then they buried Him in a tomb behind a very large boulder....

St. Peter said, "Verrrrrry good."

"Then," the blonde continued, "now every year the Jews roll away the boulder and Jesus comes out. If he sees his shadow, we have six more weeks of basketball."

St. Peter fainted...

once there was a blonde who wanted to prove ...
 
 
Once there was a blonde who wanted to prove to people that she wasn't just a dumb blonde. So she asked her friend "how could I show people I'm not just a dumb blonde?"

Her friend says, "First learn all the provinces and their capitals."

So that week the blonde learned them. The next week she was at a party and a man asked a question. The blonde says, "I know the anwser!"

Then the man said " What would you know? You're just a dumb blonde?"

Then the blonde says, "I'll have you know I'm not just a dumb blonde, I know all the provinces and their capitals."

Then the man said, " Okay, Saskatchewan."

The blonde started to grin.

"What are you grinning about?" said the man.

The blonde said, "Easy. S."

blonde chainsaw massacre
 
 
What do you call a blonde with a chainsaw?

Dead!


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