Animals

A bear walks into a bar and says, "I want a bourbon and............... coke"

The bartender asks "what's with the huge pause?"

The bear says, "I've had them all my life."

Why did the farmer sell his frog leg ranch?

He found out it was a 'rough toad to hoe.'

'Once there was husband and wife who had just bought a new mule. They were walking it down the street when the mule trips over a stone. The husband says, “That's one!”
They walk some more, when the mule trips over a stone again and the husband says, “That's two!”
Then the mule trips over a stone again. The husband says, “That's three,” and shoots the donkey!
The wife gets so mad and start's cursing at the husband and saying, “That was are only donkey! You were an idiot to shoot it!”
The husband says to his wife, that's ONE!”

Why do dinosaurs have to wear hats?
So their wives know which end to kiss!