Animals

A lady with a frog stuck to her head comes to the doctor's office. When the doctor asked her what's wrong the frog says, “I got something stuck to my ass!”

A small frog goes to a fortune teller and asks if he is gonna meet a young girl.
The teller tells him, “ Yes, you are.”
The frog replies, “Where? In a bar or at a party?”
The teller says, “In biology class!”

A man had a very small penis, so he went to a witch to make it longer. She said, “Go into the forest and ask the toad there to marry you, each time it says no, your penis will grow one inch.” Happy, the man ran to the forest and started yelling, “Froggie, Froggie, will you marry me?” The frog, of course, replied, “No,” andthe man's penis grew one inch. So he repeated this again, “Froggie, Froggie, will you marry me?” The frog yelled back, “NO!”
After a couple times more, the frog was getting mad, but the man decided one more time and one more inch wouldn't hurt, so he yelled again, “Froggie, Froggie, will you marry me?” And the exasperated frog said, “I've told you onceand I've told you a million times, no!”

A man with a fifty inch penis goes to the doctor complaining that he can't get any women. The doctor says, 'Well, I can't help you, but I know a witchdoctor who can'. So the man goes to see the witchdoctor, and the witchdoctor tells the man to go to the lake, and that when he gets there, he will see a magic frog. All he has to do is ask the frog to marry him. When the frog says 'no', his penis will shrink ten inches.
So, the man goes to the lake and sees the frog. 'Frog,' the man says, 'will you marry me?'
'No!' says the frog.
Suddenly, his penis was only forty inches long.
Well, that's good, but I need it shorter, the man thinks to himself. Once again, he asks the frog, and his penis shrinks ten inches. Now he is down to thirty inches. That's pretty good, but it could be a little shorter, he thought. So the man asks the frog to marry him, and in a furious rage the frog answews ' for the last time! NO! NO! NO!'