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the birds and the bees
 
 
A father asked his son, Little Johnny, if he knew about the birds and the bees.

"I don't want to know!" Little Johnny said, bursting into tears.

Confused, his father asked Little Johnny what was wrong.

"Oh Pop," Johnny sobbed, "For me there was no Santa Claus at age six, no Easter Bunny at seven, and no Tooth Fairy at eight. And if you're telling me now that grownups don't really have sex, I've got nothing left to believe in!"

cow reflexes
 
 
What do you call a cow with a twitch?

Beef Jerky!

rednecks' dogs
 
 
Q: Why do rednecks' dogs have flat noses?

A: From chasing parked cars...

how do you catch a squirrel?
 
 
Q: How do you catch a squirrel?

A: Climb up a tree and act like a nut!


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