animal jokes

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animal jokes


question and answer
Q: Why do hummingbirds hum?
A: Because they don't know the words.

Q: Where does a blackbird go for a drink?
A: To a crow bar.

Q: Why was the crow perched on a telephone wire?
A: He was going to make a long-distance caw.

Q: What did the chick say when it saw an orange in the nest?
A: Look at the orange mama laid.

Q: Is it good manners to eat fried chicken with your fingers?
A: No, you should eat your fingers separately.

Q: Why do hens lay eggs?
A: If they dropped them, they'd break.

Q: Why do seagulls live near the sea?
A: Because if they lived near the bay, they would be called bagels.

Q: Diner: Do you serve chicken here?
A: Waiter: Sit down, sir. We serve anyone.

question and answer
Q: Diner: I can't eat this chicken. Call the manager.
A: Waiter: It's no use. He can't eat it either.

Q: Which side of a chicken has the most feathers?
A: The outside.

Q: What do you get when you cross a parrot with a centipede?
A: A walkie-talkie, of course.

Q: Have you heard of that disease that you get from kissing birds?
A: Chirpes. It's one of those canarial diseases. I hear it's untweetable.

Q: Why don't they play poker in the jungle?
A: Too many cheetahs.

Q: What is the difference between a cat and a comma?
A: One has the paws before the claws and the other has the clause before the pause.

Q: Where do dogs go when they lose their tails?
A: To the retail store.

Q: What kind of dog tells time?
A: A watch dog.

question and answer
Q: What has four legs and an arm?
A: A happy pit bull.

Q: Why is a tree like a dog?
A: Because they both lose their bark when they die.

Q: Did you hear about the cowboy who got himself a dachshund?
A: Everyone kept telling him to get a long, little doggie.

Q: What is the difference between a rottweiler and a social worker?
A: It is easier to get your kids back from a rotweiler!

Q: Did you hear about the new breed in pet shops?
A: They crossed a pit bull with a collie; it bites your leg off and goes for help.

Q: How do you know if there is an elephant under the bed?
A: Your nose is touching the ceiling.

Q: What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhinoceros?
A: Elephino.

question and answer
Q: What do you get when you cross an elephant with a kangaroo?
A: Holes all over Australia.

Q: What do you get if you cross an elephant with a whale?
A: A submarine with a built-in snorkel.

Q: Why did the elephant cross the road?
A: Chicken's day off.

Q: Why do elephants have trunks?
A: Because they would look silly with glove compartments.

Q: Why do elephants drink so much?
A: To try to forget.

Q: How can you tell if an elephant is getting ready to charge?
A: He pull out his Diners' Club card.

Q: What do you get when two giraffes collide?
A: A giraffic jam.


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